I'd like this to be some kind of New Year's resolution kind of thing, but I started getting back into VR fitness games at the beginning of December because my t-shirts were starting to sag like a little rubber band, barely holding up a giant stack of papers. . Logos have been stretched to the point that they may or may not spell a word. Even though I have a gym membership and live pretty close to one of the most famous parks in the world, I'm terrible at moving if there isn't a free item at the end of it. So I found myself refocusing on virtual reality fitness games.
The strange thing is that it used to work. I lost about 30 pounds during the pandemic—that time when everyone was skating on the hype and the good vibes. Some of it was from pure stress and panic, but a lot of it stemmed from the fact that my way of relieving said stress was working in virtual reality. That could include games like Beat Saber, sure, but areas like the training gym in Creed: Rise to Glory felt like fake places to do cardio and take a break and catch some breath. Either way, I actually created a healthy and successful workout routine that was 75 percent putting weights on my hands and ankles and doing little punches, kicks, and squats. It wasn't a balanced routine, but it worked.
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New habits die fast
And then the world opened up again and people were busy. I got bored of staying in and went out during that time like I had to maintain situational awareness of a cold war spy passing nuclear secrets. I was ready to live real life again. My exercise routine fell by the wayside. I ended up joining a fancy gym, but the fancy gym is far enough away for me to avoid. That wasn't the original plan, but it sure turned out that way! Oh man! It's too cold to go to the gym. It's too hot to go to the gym. I just had lunch. I'm too hungry.
So, in an effort to get more comfortable in my body, I went back to the thing that has worked best over the years: video games. When I went to college I weighed more than I had ever weighed in my life. I weighed much, much more in high school than I do now. Between my first and second year, I spent two or three hours on the treadmill every day using the Wavebird controller to play the GBA Castlevania games on the GameCube. That worked. I fell off the machine a lot—and still do a lot—but regardless, video games seemed to be the key to being less… worried about the doctors at my annual checkups.
Fortunately, exercising in virtual reality is actually a thousand times easier than it was a few years ago. The full-color pass-through alone has made it easier to take breaks, check my phone if it's ringing, and use the bathroom while I ponder the wisdom of wearing advanced technology while I pee. I know it looks gross, and it is, but I'll tell you what's grosser: taking off your headset for five minutes and putting it back on feels how much sweat you've left behind. At least here I can stay in the virtual world until my thighs hurt from dodging flying objects or whatever.
There are also, blessedly, many more games that involve exercise. I like Beat Saber, don't get me wrong, but there was a time when it was a lot of Beat Saber and a few programs specifically made for exercise. These programs still exist, even though they love to change their names and financial model every three months, so there's a whole other confusing way to pay for routines. For exercise? Subscription? ads? Who knows! Seriously, there was a great program called BOX VR that weirdly renamed itself FIT XR and decided that the best way to make exercise more fun was to add a dozen slow-moving, pointless menus aimed at getting you to spend money on extra features. It was a decent program when I wanted to get a quick workout in, but now it's fantastic for wasting time scrolling through menus.
VR Fitness is constantly improving
That said, some exercise-oriented games have gotten better. I got a chance to play an early build of Exercise Your Demons, the name of which is pretty self-explanatory. It doesn't play any differently than many exercise games (punch, duck, punch), but the onslaught of enemies, changing levels, and collectibles at least adds a more gamified element. I don't mean the fake ass “YOU DID GREAT! A+” gamifying is more like a report card. Real gaming stuff.
And luckily, Exercise Your Demons is fun and joyful. Outside of Creed, it seems like most VR fitness apps try to mimic the feeling of a meditation spa. Which is great! It's nice to feel pampered! But I liked the cartoon characters cheering me on while I beat up the cartoon villains and quickly duck to avoid the cartoon demon bats. The silliness and arcade makes it move faster than a calm voice telling me “You're doing great, only 30 minutes of boredom left!”
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Maybe that's why it was easy to get back into the fitness routine that helped me get through one of the worst periods of this century. Yeah, a lot of them are still music games. But Samba de Amigo plays a lot differently than Beat Saber, which plays a lot different than Maestro—I use all of that and alternate between them. I play a lot more Pistol Whip and I swear to god my legs are starting to feel like tree trunks. Moving on to PS VR2, Kayak VR: The Mirage makes me hold my hands up and gently wave them for long periods of time, giving me the illusion of exploring a beautiful coastline. A few extra pounds and a little imagination can go a long way.
I'm not saying that virtual reality can or will be the central key to better health. I've been down this road before. I wrote about fighting my body problems with games, which is like fighting mouse cheese problems. Or fight your body problems with cheese. It's not important. I know that in addition to cardio, lifting weights and using other body parts is vital. I agree with that! And of course I'm sure I'll get into it. But I'm glad I have this headset, it's taken me back on some journey. The fact that it's fun, the fact that no one can see you, and the fact that I feel the need to exercise and then immediately exercise without preparation helped me. It won't change everything, but maybe it's a start. Or you know, reboot reboot reboot.
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